Day 30 Lisa Kleypas – Embracing Our Love of Love

Go On and Love It If You Like It

It is a truth universally acknowledged that everyone loves romance, but hardly anyone wants to admit it.  As a result, romance is now most often secretssummerserved as a discreet side dish for other, more respected fare, such as dystopian YA, suspense, or literary fiction.  If you try reading a full-out romance novel in public without hiding the cover, some people are going to be a little embarrassed for you. Our love of romance fiction doesn’t always convince others of our intellectual depth and sophistication.

It should, though.

There is nothing so powerful—or important—as the enduring emotional connection between two people in love.  If romance isn’t worth reading and celebrating, what is? Romance novels still feature the kind of banter and sexiness and sincerity that Hollywood has forgotten how to do.  No one has to die of random cancer at the end: set down that tissue box. These books are calorie-free, sexy, and informative–no wonder they’re habit-forming. And not only are they a perfect way to pass the time, they also make your real-life relationships better.  So don’t hold back, fearless reader. As the Redbone lyric says, “Go on and love it if you like it.”

Here are a few valuable things I’ve learned from romance novels, accompanied by a few of my favorite quotes:

1. “I married a damned cereal killer.”  –Susan Elizabeth Phillips, Nobody’s Baby But Mine

Romance novels remind us to keep our sense of humor. I have no idea why my husband Greg always sets his dirty cereal bowl on the counter instead of remembering to put it in the dishwasher, despite my frequent reminders. I can only conclude that he believes we live with a magical dish fairy. Greg, for his part, questions why I always want half of his dessert, or why different areas of my skin need different moisturizers. But this is the stuff that couples need to laugh about. Laughter relieves stress, helps to smooth over differences, and draws us closer together.

2. “I deserve passion,” she said. “I deserve to be loved—in every way. I deserve a man who’ll give his whole heart, not the part he isn’t using at the devil kleypasmoment.”  –Loretta Chase, Silk Is For Seduction

“You’re the missing piece of me,” Quin said. “You make me feel.”  –Eloisa James, The Duke Is Mine.

If you feel it, say it. We all deserve to be loved sincerely and passionately. Some people are reluctant to say “I love you” because they don’t want to wear it out, as if the phrase were a cheap pair of acrylic socks. But “I love you” is a gift of reassurance and affection that takes only 0.7 seconds to say. In that same amount of time, a hummingbird has to flap his wings thirty-five times, which requires a heck of a lot more effort. The point is, couples in romance novels don’t take each other for granted, and neither should we. Express your love generously and often.

3. “She had no idea how long they kissed—and kissed—but she didn’t think about stopping until they ran out of air.”–Jill Shalvis, Once In A Lifetime

Make time for intimacy. Sometimes you may be too tired for a bedroom romp with your significant other, or you don’t feel all that sexy after eating that clandestine bag of potato chips . . . but do it anyway. You’ll be glad you did.  Plus, the more romance novels you read, the easier it is to get into the spirit of things. There are places in our brains where the lines and scenes from our favorite books tend to linger and sparkle . . . they make us smile . . . and they make sex more fun. It’s a great way to celebrate, if you ask me.


My recommendations are the authors and books quoted above . . . you can’t go wrong with any of these goddesses of romance.

Questions for the Author:

Describe the most daring, adventurous or inspiring thing you ever did.

About eight years ago, Greg and I and our two children moved from Texas to Washington State. We had previously visited the Pacific Northwest for a couple of brief trips, and we loved the coffee culture, the mountains and trees,  and the friendly easygoing people. Everything was new and exciting. What Greg and I discovered was that when you move to an entirely different place, you discover abilities and interests you didn’t know you had, and you even change some of the ways you think about things. We love living here, and we’re so glad we took a chance on it.

Tell us about your journey to becoming a writer.

I was a voracious reader as a child, and I liked writing stories, but it wasn’t until I was sixteen that I knew I was meant to be a writer. I was a sophomore in high school, and I was attending a three-week summer camp. I had bought a pound of loose stationery paper, colored bright yellow, so I could write letters to family and friends. But during the daily two-hour break in the afternoons, I started writing a novel, and almost immediately there was a deep-down click, like part of my soul had just settled into place. I finished the novel, and wrote another book every summer until I finally sold one just before I graduated from college.

Tell us about the book that changed your life.

So many books have influenced my life, but especially “A Return To Love” by Marianne Williamson. There is so much wisdom, light and joy in that book.  This is the quote that changed me profoundly the instant that I read it:  “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’ Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God.”

Lisa is generously giving away a set of the Wallflower historical romance quartet, and a copy of the novella “A Wallflower Christmas” to one U.S. reader (apologies to international friends). Entry below.

kleypasLisa Kleypas is a New York Times bestselling author of both historical and contemporary romance. Her thirty-eight novels and four novellas have been published in twenty-four languages and are bestsellers around the world. After graduating from Wellesley College with a political science degree, Lisa sold her first book and made a full-time career of writing the kinds of romances she has always loved to read.  Lisa is living her own happily-ever-after in Washington State with her husband Greg and their two children.



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  • Kathy Nye

    You are simply the best.
    I am going to read “A Return to Love” based on the wonderful quote you shared. Thanks.

  • Cheryl Hastings

    Love the quotes…read them all!!

  • Patty Vasquez

    “We all deserve to be loved sincerely and passionately.” This is so true.

    Yesterday we were walking around our state fair when it began to rain. Torrential rain! I had a light jacket, but it wasn’t waterproof. All of the nearby kiosks sold out of their rain ponchos immediately. My husband- who had a waterproof jacket!- walked 2 blocks up, 1 block over, wading through ankle deep puddles to get a rain poncho for me. When I thanked him for his kindness, I told him he is the kind of real-life romance hero authors are talking about during RARM. His response? He said he just didn’t want me to get wet. We will celebrate our 24th wedding anniversary in 9 days and he is always surprising me with these everyday romantic gestures. (My aunt went to Wellesley, too.)

  • Sharlene Wegner

    I have no problem reading a romance novel in public! The librarians know me by name! Love your books & all of the authors you have recommended!

  • Connie Saunders

    Enjoyed Lisa’s observations about romance!

  • Heather Prince

    Enjoyed reading one of my favorite authors observations on romance and loved the quotes!!

  • Make Kay

    I loved your statement “There is nothing so powerful—or important—as the enduring emotional connection between two people in love”

  • TrishJ

    I have read all the books you quoted. I love that romance books make me feel. A laugh served with it is just a bonus.

  • Ellen

    I love romances with humor, they make my life brighter. I’ve read some of your recommended books, enjoyed them all. Looking forward to your next new book.

  • Martha B

    You’re brave to write this column at the end of the Read-A-Romance month. Still, you had fresh insights, observations, and thought provoking perspectives that resonated with me (the reader). If I had to choose only ONE sentence from above, it would be: “There is nothing so powerful — or important — as the enduring emotional connection between two people in love.”

    Lisa, I love your books (I’ve read them all). Some are on my keeper shelf because I just can’t part with them. I never tire of meeting my friends for coffee. Why should I quit my fictional friends?!

  • Joyce Rajnyak Burkhardt

    What a lovely discussion of romance novels and why we enjoy them. I have never been embarrassed to read them in public but some of those older covers were a bit embarrassing ;-). My kindle solved that issue as no one knows what I am reading. Thank you for the quote from Marianne Williamson’ s book. I have not read it for years and forgot how much I enjoyed it. I enjoy your books too!

  • Kashms

    I love your books Lisa and have read all of them. Your observations on romance are amazing.

  • Dawna Coniglio

    I’m not afraid to flaunt my books, however I use the more tasteful covers when I’m in public. You are one of my favorite authors and I have bonded with others over your books 🙂

  • Danielle Beaulieu

    I love your books! 🙂

  • Rita Wray

    Love the quotes!

  • cheryl c.

    I enjoy all of your books! I am not entering the contest because I already have these books. In fact, they are on my “keeper shelf.”

  • Nicole Fortuna

    I love your books! Devil in Winter is my favorite and I read it once a year. Loved your quotes in your essay!

  • Sheila M

    Loved your essay above. I’ve added a new book (Jill Shalvis) to my reading list (I already read the other two authors).

  • Lorelei’s Lit Lair

    Oh, Lisa, what a great essay, my favorite: Express your love generously and often. I enjoy both your contemporary and historical romances, I believe I started reading historicals with you! I reeeeeealy wish luck is on my side to win your giveaway. crossing fingers! ♥♥♥

  • Kathleen O

    Thanks for writing such great books..

  • Sheryl N

    Thanks for all the great books.

  • Brenda Dickson

    What a fantastic essay! Thank you so much! It made my whole day reading it.

  • Emmel

    I love your opening sentence of this essay. Somewhere, Jane Austen is smiling. 🙂

  • Amanda Vincent

    Love the Wallflower series!

  • Tammy H

    Great essay!

  • Debbie Fuller

    Thank you and I so agree with reading romance to get us in the mood. What better reason to read romance. Husbands should encourage and rejoice in our reading choice.

  • Mj

    I love your books, especially since I grew up in the PNW (British Columbia) and now live in Washington State and so when one of your books is based here I know some of the places you are talking about 🙂

  • Patty Wilcox

    I loved your essay. You mentioned some of my favorite authors. (You are also one of my favorite authors.) Nowadays, I mostly read on my Nook. But I know people look down on romances. My husbands reads most of my books but calls the Harlequins I have brain candy. (He likes the paranormal romances.)

  • Deb Hinshaw

    I enjoyed Devil in Winter, and I can see why many other authors always say you are their go-to author to read. Your essay was lovely. Thank you, too, for sharing a few personal tidbits about you and your husband.

  • Erica H

    What a great way to highlight the importance of romance by using fabulous quotes from great authors.

  • Sharon Forbes

    I loved reading your post, and I especially loved that quote from Marianne Williamson’s novel, A Return To Love, now I am going to have to find that and read it! I have enjoyed reading so many of your novels, thank you, and please continue writing many more! 🙂

  • Eileen Aberman-Wells

    I loved your post & loved the quotes that matched the parts. Of course I’ve read all but Loretta Chase’s book. My daughter has introduced me to your books. It’s a thing we do to each other. The most important thing is that reading romance novels does not make one less intelligent or boring or . . . As someone previously posted, it’s a guilty pleasure. Thank you for your post.

  • LSUReader

    What wonderful recommendations to read! Of course, your own books are deservedly up there on many must-read lists, Thanks for participating in R-A-R Month.

  • LisaVH

    Hollywood could definitely learn a thing or two from romance novels. I find that I would much rather sit down with a good book rather than watching what passes for romantic comedy lately.

  • Loraine Oliver

    I have been reading Lisa kleypas’s books for such a long time, and if I had to pick a favorite book or series, it would be so hard to do, I remember when I first got one of her books it was at the library and it was so good, and I consumed everything I could find of hers, and I just loved the series like the Hathaways and the Wallflowers, to me these are the real romance books, they make your heart pound, you laugh at the situations that sometimes come up and you cry at others, and there is nothing in my opinion that tops anything better than a true romance book like this author writes-she does not to have to write a whole book filled with erotic encounters-her words of love, laughter, tears and happily ever afters is true romance and I am so grateful to know authors like Lisa Kleypas!

  • M Kuxhaus

    I loved the quotes you used! Those are some of my favorite authors!

  • Dawn Anderson

    I’m glad to know that I was not the only kid who wrote stories on summer vacation. 🙂

  • Anna

    One of my biggest adventures was also moving to Washington State, except that I moved from New York.

  • Quinn Fforde

    Excellent post! That is why I am not ashamed of reading romance. Love your books!

  • Julie

    I love your books. Thank you for sharing your wonderful talent

  • Pamby50

    I am sure there was a little culture shock when you moved. I’ve been through that. I do love all the authors you were quoting & that is why I love reading your books.

  • Joan Varner

    I am blessed to be of an age where I read what I want and really don’t care what other people think about the books that I am reading. Your books provide me with that wonderful escape.

  • Oh, gosh, I loved the second quote. So good!!!
    It’s so fun to unabashedly love something and I decided that, for me, that something is going to be romance novels, it was a very liberating thought.

  • Chelsea B.

    Your books are all that is lovely! I enjoyed reading your answers!

  • Feifei Le

    Thank you for sharing your thoughts! I LOVE your books and have re-read most! 🙂

  • Meredith Richeson Hillenbrand

    Right after I got married, I had to move from San Diego, California, to Las Vegas, NV. It was a culture shock for me, as well. Imagine, slot machines in the grocery stores! However, I survived for 21 years before moving back full circle to San Diego. I am glad you had such a good experience with your move. Having an “open mind” makes all the difference! I also enjoyed your second and third quotes and love Eloisa James, too!

  • Kim Millsaps Kalusa

    Dying to read a new book..Maybe a new historical series?? 🙂
    Lisa Kleypas Rocks!! Love to read her blogs on a daily basis!!–huge fan here!!

  • Hany Grace Zala Dragneel

    i love reading romance books . makes me feel and understand love under different circumstances 😀 !

  • Yaritza Santana

    Lisa Kleypas rocks. I love her books.

  • WinnieP

    My favorite authors’ quotes. Great post. No wonder I love your books.

  • I am sooooo happy that Lisa will be writing a new Historical Romance series! Yes!
    I really love reading romance, historical romance in particular because it’s my escape from reality. There is just something about finishing a book with a happy ending in the end that really makes my day. Sure, I love to read dystopian and YA but historical romance takes first place in my heart! (yes, my hubby is second… LOL) 🙂

  • Glenda

    Great post, Lisa! Loved the quotes and especially the opening!

  • michelle fitzsimons

    Thanks for sharing, Lisa! You brought a smile to my face just as so many of your books do too;-)

  • Stephanie Reuter

    Great use of quotes to get your point across! That cereal quote made me grin like an idiot, even though its a bit childish. We all need a bit of childishness in ourselves to be happy.

  • Stephanie M.

    Thank you for your post. I love all your books and look forward to reading Lightning Bay (and any other books from you). 🙂

  • Janie McGaugh

    I enjoyed to post, and the quotes were great!

  • Diana

    One word, Awsome.

  • Krysten Mich

    Loved this post! And all of your books of course! 😉

  • monica87

    Wow. What a great quote to be inspired by. Very powerful. Love and adore Lisa Kleypas. There is no one like her. Her books always bring me so much comfort and joy. Her heroes are what I measure all other heroes and real life guys up to. Very hard to compete with. 😛

  • mariannewestrich

    You just moved up in my TBR pile. Can’t wait! 😎

  • Mary Ruth Baloy

    I love her! <3

  • Julie Nieves

    Your reading recommendations have put my list over the top but I’m not complaining!

  • Debbie Kitzke

    Love your books…..

  • Courtney Cogswell

    Love your books and I definitely agree with your valuable things learned…Humor, Passion and Intimacy are all vital to a fulfilling and long lasting relationship. I’m happy to say that I have all three, some days more of one than the others but they all work together to keep our relationship going strong. Happy endings and romance in general makes me feel like such a better person to be around and I couldn’t keep my positive attitude and optimism going without all of you amazing writers out there! And the sheer volume of books on my to be read list from this year’s Read a Romance month is going to keep me on a happy romance high until next year!!! Thanks for all you do and I love your essay here on RARM!

    • Thanks, Courtney! And congratulations on winning the “A Well-Read Woman. . .” tote bag!

    • Thanks so much Courtney, and congratulations. xo

  • Kim

    I’m looking forward to your new historical series.

  • Sue G.

    I love my romances for all the reasons you stated! At the end of the day, they just make me happy…unless of course there is a cliffhanger that I have to wait for my happy ending! 🙂

  • Jasmine Clay Mendez

    A Lisa Kleypas book is my saving grace. That is why I have read ALL of them.

  • rebecca moe

    I’ve read all of the books you quoted! I especially love the cereal killer one–I always forget about that scene when I’m re-reading it, and it surprises me and makes me laugh out loud when I get to it.

    Thanks for the post 🙂

  • Anisa

    I’m so excited for your new historical series. The previous ones were simply amazing. Sebastian is definitely my favourite hero of all time.

  • Emily Seelye

    Love your post!

  • Erin F

    thanks for such a fun post! All of your points hit the nail on the head 🙂 Thanks for sharing!

  • Kim

    I love the Wallflower quartet! St. Vincent is one of my favorite heroes and Evie was the perfect match for him!

  • Belky Barrios Garcia

    Hi Lisa! I’m Belky, I am from Colombia, I LOVE your historical books, I am fan of you since 2007 (when I was 18) and I always will be xxx

    Good Bless you!

  • flchen1

    I love all the Wallflowers, but Devil in Winter is one of my top comfort re-reads… thanks for continuing to write fabulous stories, Lisa!

  • Mary Dieterich

    Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I agree, we’re all fabulous!

  • I love the Wallflower series, especially Devil in Winter. I feel I can relate to Evie. I completely agree that romance novels have a sort of banter and lightheartedness that can’t be found in other books. I feel romance novels are great way to relieve stress and even discover what relationships work.

  • Linnea Bassin

    I always laugh with my husband. It has gotten us through many hard times.

  • Chanpreet

    I love stories that can make me laugh AND cry. However I value humor most of all.

  • Judy Goodnight

    Great quotes and I totally agree with what you had to say in your post.

  • Fern Martin

    Love your books!!!

  • Timitra

    So much truth in this post…thanks for sharing Lisa

  • Congrats to Courtney Cogswell for the being the lucky person whose name was chosen at random from among the comments here. Courtney, if you will use the contact form on my website to provide us with your mailing address, we’ll get your tote bag out as soon as possible. Thanks!

    • Courtney Cogswell

      Thank you so much! I’m so excited to win 🙂 I’ll head right over to your website now…thank you, thank you, thank you!!!